00- Relena the Bar Tender the altered
by Firebreather
Summary: Rated R for Relena. Fic, character bashing. Yes, we ARE asking for flames.


Author Note: Hey this is another Trowa/Relena story like I said before most of my stories will be about them or they will be really close friends. I will some time make a Heero/Relena story and then make a Milliardo/Une story but right now it is Relena/Trowa. Please enjoy and don't forget to R AND R!  
  
  
Firebreather note: This is an altered version of the story by RelenaBarton. We are not bashing the author, but we ARE bashing the fic. And yes, we are looking for flames. No, we are not scared of anything. We do deserving fics!  
  
Standard warnings: Relena bashing, fic bashing, possible shonen ai/yaoi.  
  
Rated R for Relena aka Roger.  
Read at your own consent.  
  
  
  
Relena the bar tender  
  
relena got a BAR and it's tender. Told ja she's a GUY, and HIS name's ROGER.  
the fic bashing, by: Firebreather  
  
  
It was 2:00 a.m. at the bar the G-boys were at the people working there were Lady Une, Hilde, Catherine, Dorothy, Noin, and Relena Peacecraft.  
  
The reason why anyone would even be at such bar with the weird chicks at 2 am is beyond any human's comprehension.  
  
  
The bar was called Innocence  
  
Especially with that name.  
  
and Lady Une had bought it.  
  
The worse investment she had done in her live after doing it with Treize.  
  
Dorothy or her nickname "The Heartbreaker" danced on the bar  
  
making dents all over the table with the eyebrows.  
  
with Une which was "The Boss"  
  
of the Yakuza.  
  
  
after the song they annouced "The Flame."  
  
"the Flaming Fart"  
  
That was Relena.   
  
In her regular hideous skimpy pink bikini. Fat, lard and boils spill all over. Everyone present was thanking God for letting her still wear the little bikini, at least they don't have to see the rest of her fur.  
  
The reason why they'd let her dance is that because it's either that, or she's gonna sing.  
  
  
Trowa smiled knowing his fiancé had a job like this.  
  
THAT'S.....a JOB? Trowa's not so loving after all, ne?  
  
"So how is everything going with Lena?" asked a smiling Duo.  
  
"Besides hugging the damned loaded teddy bear? Trippin'." Wufei gladly answered.  
  
Quatre chimed in, dewy eyed, "But, those people in the white jacket told me that they're going to put her to sleep!"  
  
Trowa just laughed and said "Grrreat!"  
  
"Hn. It's because Ritalin and Viagra isn't working for her anymore." grunted Heero.  
  
then they turned to Relena who was drinking a lot of beer  
  
and her own pee.  
  
and getting it all over her tight black dress and her high heel shoes.  
  
Fat jiggling around as she moves, running after the cheetos bag.  
  
After her dance she ran over to Trowa and kissed him on the lips sticking her tongue in his mouth and licked his own with hers. "What did you think Honey?" she asked looking at Trowa.  
  
Trowa blinked.  
  
He blinked again.  
  
He ran out of the damned bar to barf everything in his digestive systems.   
  
"You were great and when we get married I am going to give you the best ring ever."  
Chirped an eerie voice in Roger's head.  
  
Relena smiled  
  
showing the world her grey teeth and bleeding gum.  
  
and said "I love you so much Trowa."  
  
Imaginary Trowa put his arm around her waist "I love you too now what do you say can I have a beer?"  
  
Roger grinned even wider, with everyone in the room share horrified looks.  
  
Trowa entered the pub again, this time, a gun in his hand.  
  
"Heero!" he called, still kinda green, throwing the gun at his comrade.  
  
Heero caught it expertly, nodding in knowledge of what he needs to do.  
  
*BANG*  
  
Relena's limp body and what's left of her head dropped onto the floor.  
  
"Oh nooooooooooo......" Quatre faked another cry, throwing himself into Trowa's arms.  
  
"What's wrong little one?"  
  
"Nothing,....I just want to be in your arms," Quatre beamed, snuggling his koi.  
  
"......oh."  
  
Duo slapped Heero's back, "Oy! For that, I'll give ya spanking!"  
  
"Hn," Heero smirked, "You better."  
  
Dorothy and Une stared at the bloody mess for a while. Then glanced at each other and shrugged. The pub wasn't that clean earlier anyway.  
  
They decided to burn the damned so-called club.  
  
And everyone lived happily ever after.  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
No, we're not sorry.  
  
We're making this so-called fic actually BETTER.  
  
Flame US!  



End file.
